"I disobey" and "I forgot the time" by Nicodemus Nicoludis

I disobey 

the wind 

when examining 

this interglacial verse

and the way 

I am 

in truth 

so human 

set to hum 

my palinodes 

like a riverbed 

Gigantic 

I am not going 

to call this 

resistance 

but maybe the actual 

slipping into 

darkness like 

the cigarettes 

the men outside 

the deli smoke 

between pulls 

from a bottle 

of mamajuana

But I am only just 

reading into this 

radiance as the 

defiant soliloquy 

made exactly 

as it should be 

alone and quiet 

lasting only 

for the last 

of us who 

will cash our 

paychecks for 

a view of the 

stars uncostly 

and totalitarian

I forgot the time 

I needed to be

at work 

while making coffee

It’s early

enough to know 

that without asking

the Earth keeps

breaking into

smaller parts

I name the morning

consumption

Or the unbearable

call to be productive

I just want to think 

about us in bed 

as we roll closer 

into each other 

and I see the scar 

on my knee

from falling 

on rocks at the beach 

trying to be brave 

for my brother

as he walked 

the tide pools

for the first time

after moving

from Pittsburgh

to New Hampshire

I wonder

were they 

always this

purposeful? 

We never found

a lobster

Never understood 

how lungs work 

Do we just

keep going?

Should I keep going?

I don’t think

that’s philosophy 

Can I slow down 

for a moment now?

See life for

its exchanges

The fission of

wage-time 

free-time 

time-to-destination

labor-time

divided by 

value-time

We get closer

to a revolution 

when we start thinking

about time

as pleasure not

commodity

Its value a temporal 

ghost haunting life until

we stop time

as material 

and bring it back 

from its exchange 

That is to say

from the time

it takes for you 

to read this poem

I will have made

approximately $ .50

-

Nicodemus Nicoludis is a poet, adjunct professor and the managing editor of Archway Editions. He is the author of the chapbook Natural History (rot house books, 2018) and his work appears in Potluck Mag, Small Orange, Maudlin House, Chronogram, Reality Hands, Burning House Press and elsewhere.